Expand your jokes with these afterthought questions
Add some afterthoughts to your afterthoughts
To everyone competing in the Berlin New Stand-Up Award this month - have fun! And move the damn mic-stand! Other handy hints are in this article:
Afterthought is a great way to tag jokes to your premises while keeping the style authentic & not too rim-shotty 🥁
Here are some afterthought ideas for you. I’ll try the first few with a premise lifted from my own notes. At the end I’ll put al the prompts into a downloadable document.
Waiting for the bus is so embarrassing “I’m a baby and my pram hasn’t arrived”
Remember that writing is winning, so even if your answer doesn’t exactly fit the question but it inspires you to write something, then you’ve won! 🏆 If you can’t think of an answer to a question just move on rather than getting blocked. Come back to it later, maybe you’ll think of something or maybe not - it doesn’t matter. Better to force yourself to write something unfunny than write nothing at all.
I have paywalled half of this as it’s technically an exercise 🤑
Time shift afterthoughts
What if this happened 100(or more) years ago?
If you think waiting for the M41 is bad, imagine in the old days where there was one carriage the whole month “We regret to inform you of the late running of the Northbound carriage due to horse death is delayed by -9 days-. And then you catch the plague on it. I suppose that puts non functioning USB chargers in perspective. Do you ever plug your power bank into one of those to give the bus more juice? Let’s gooo! What if you could see the file directory on the bus. Uh oh its all bus-driver porn.”
How would you explain this to an old person?
Old people love the bus, they’re bus royalty. They always know exactly when the bus is coming. Forget the timetable, one you see Heinrich hobbling over to the stop you know it’s crunch time. When they get on you have to give your seat to them “My leige”. They travel for free. As a lesbian I should get free bike repair - just kidding, I can do it myself.
How would a caveman react to this?
In The Flintstones they only really had 2 ideas to recreate modern conveniences - a dinosaur is doing it, or it’s propelled by feet.
They had buses or cars made of stone with little trap doors on the bottom and you just walk them along like a fancy dress costume. The Flintstones was fucking stupid. (I’m sure people have doe material about The Flintstones)
How would a time traveler from the past react?
Abusing horses is somehow more dignified than this. Why is it so hot? Everyone is wearing a jacket. I was prepared for the mini-screens, this was in my preparation class - but why do some play the sound out loud when they could just play it through the ear pieces? It seems very obnoxious.
What will people think about this 100(or more) years from now?
How pimitive the old ground buses were. They had old USB A ports than never worked. Now we have USB J ports that don’t work. Your buses are so quiet. We have JBL speakers that’ll literally explode your intestines. JBL are on trial for war crimes in our time. If you don’t give your seat up for an old person in our time you’ll get murdered with death rays.
What if this happened in the Middle Ages?
Perspective Shift Questions
How would a child interpret this?
A bus is a big smelly car with lots of loud strangers in it and it stops all the time and is realy slow. The seats are really dirty because they have had lots of smelly farting bottoms on them!
How would an alien react to this?
What if you had to explain this to an animal?
They should have bus cats, that would make it bareable. Just loose cats on the bus.
How would a conspiracy theorist spin this?
The government is tracking us through the BVG app man. They know our whereabouts at all time man (also the government) the bus is cancelled because of a leaf.
How would this look from a completely different culture?
I got a bunch of buses in Mexico and the driver was watching porn. This was different drivers. I mean whatever gets us over this mountain pass with no barriers in one piece. Is this bus stick-shift? Ey-ohh! Boner.
What if this was the first time in history that it ever happened?
I once went to Hiddensee an island north of German. Firstly, not that well hidden - it’s on all the boat schedules (lol). We thought it would be really cool because no cars are allowed. Nope! Humans ruined it! Their gimmick was horse-drawn buses and the horses looked so skinny and mistreated and were just shitting everywhere.
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